EGYPTIAN RIVERS

from Midwest Conservative Journal by The Editor

The Philadelphia Inquirer visits Chuckles-World:

In suspending him in 2007, the [Episcopal] church alleged that [Bishop Charles] Bennison hadn’t protected a girl in his California parish from his brother John’s sex abuse in the 1970s and had concealed the abuse. In 2008, a church court found him guilty on both counts and ordered him deposed.

In July, however, an appeals court of eight bishops ruled that, although Bennison had failed to protect or comfort the victim, the statute of limitations on his conduct had long since expired.

In other words, Chuckles is as guilty as sin but got off on a technicality.

In an interview soon after he was restored to his post, Bennison called the denomination’s efforts to depose him “Machiavellian,” the charges against him “Kafka-esque,” and his suspension “craziness.” Church leaders wanted him out, he surmised, because of his sometimes-divisive leadership style and controversial financial priorities.

You can’t fool Chuck Bennison; dude didn’t arrive in Philly on a load of watermelons yesterday, as they say. That’s exactly why the Episcopalians wanted to cap a solidly leftist, borderline Spongian bishop and the fact that 815 thinks that possessing the tiniest bit of moral authority on the issue of clergy sexual abuse would be a nice thing to have had nothing whatsoever to do with it.

Bennison conceded he should have acted decisively when he became cognizant of the behavior of his brother, a parish youth minister. But he insisted he should not have been forced from office because of it. Like nearly all clergy in the 1970s, he was untrained for such situations, he said, and the canons used to charge him were not adopted until 2003.

Let me see if I have this straight. Charles Bennison claims that he needed “training” to figure out what most intelligent people learn fairly quickly, namely, that statutory rape is like a sin and stuff. Yet Chuckles concealed who his perv brother was doing and what his perv brother was doing to her which implies(hell, screams) that the Episcopal Bishop of Pennsylvania is lying through his episcopal teeth.

But never let it be said that this suspension, as brief as it was, was a bad thing. Perish the thought. Because it gave Bishop Fictional McDouchebag all the time in the world to work on his martyr complex.

During his 33-month exile, he began each day with Mass and Communion at St. Clement’s Parish in Center City. He “got to know my children and grandchildren better,” worked out, studied theology and law, and read Franz Kafka’s surrealist novel The Trial, about a man sentenced for an unexplained crime.

He also read two books about Alfred Dreyfus, a Jewish officer in the French army falsely accused and exiled in 1894 for treason. “The commandant rips everything off his uniform,” Bennison said, shaking his head in wonder, and recalling the abruptness with which he had to turn over his office keys, cell phone, and computer.

Yeah, that was exactly the same situation. Just shut up, dumbass.

The Episcopal bishops, Chuckles among them, are currently meeting out in Arizona and getting their expected pseudo-Christian moral posturing in. Thusfar, the Bennison situation doesn’t seem to have come up.

It desperately needs to. Even the Episcopal left knows what a liability Chuckles is. So TEO either figures out a way to run this clown or it keeps its mouth shut whenever the issue of clergy sexual abuse comes up. There’s no middle ground.